Monica tries boogie boarding

And the video editing continues. This is from our cruise this last fall in the eastern Caribbean. Monica had wanted to go on a cruise for a long time but the idea of sitting around poolside and stuffing myself with food never sounded appealing. But Mon kept the pressure on and found a way to save money by teaching scrap booking classes on-board and also found a cruise ship that had a wave ( flow rider) on it. She knew saving money and surfing are two ways to change my heart.

We had fantastic time. I was blown away by how much fun I had. From dancing, sailing, eating, meeting a ton of cool people, and riding the flow rider, we had great time.

Monica spent most her mornings resting poolside or doing scrap booking stuff while I hung out with the teenagers at the flow rider. Surfing the wave proved to be pretty tough and I'm certainly not going to be joining any pro-tours soon. But the boogie boarding was surprisingly fun. After several days, I finally talked Mon into giving it a try.

****Again, I'm realizing when I post videos on the blog from Youtube, the widescreen video doesn't fit very well in the window provided and also the advertisements are placed directly over my witty comments. To avoid both these problems I suggest clicking on the Youtube button on the bottom right and watching the video from YouTube's site. From there you can click on the 'x' on the ads and they'll go away.

Bad Cop, No Doughnut

When I was younger, I had a small problem with authority. Of my many questionable ideas, I didn't think the speed limit pertained to me. While in college in Idaho, where speeding tickets were only $5o, I was pulled over an amazing amount of times. By the time I was 23, I believe I had collected about 17 moving violations!! And that doesn't even account for the times I was caught speeding and given a warning.

The combination of being an idiot, having a job with money to spend, being on my parents' insurance, and having a fast car almost cost me my right to drive.

I remember being away at college, probably having accumulated 3-5 speeding tickets in the previous few months when my Dad called. He told me that their insurance company had just notified them that their rates would be going up since I had gotten a ticket. Yes, 'a' ticket....singular. I recall thinking, "wait 'till the insurance company finds about the other four tickets." Sorry about that Mom and Dad.

The good news is, since my marriage (and the chance to pay for my own insurance), I haven't gotten any tickets! That's almost 13 years of being a slow-poke. Now days, I get passed all the time, especially by those college-age punks!

Unfortunately, my lovely wife has taken a different approach since our marriage. She likes to amass a ticket every 1-2 years, just enough for me to raise my blood pressure. Most have been of the speeding variety, but my favorite was being caught by a traffic camera rolling through a red-light, on a cell phone, with the kids in the back seat, eating a pizza, smoking a cigarette (maybe a slight exaggeration). Say 'cheese'. The funny thing is that every time she gets pulled over, she does what every woman should do...cry like you've never cried before. But for Mon, it's been to no avail, she undoubtedly still gets the ticket....until this week. She was pulled over and after some theatrics that only a professional actress would be proud of, she DIDN'T get a ticket. Good job Monica.

A week in Paris

Monica spent six days last week in Anaheim, CA for a scrapbook convention. With her gone, it was single-parent time for me. (i.e. Mac-n-Cheese, Spaghetti's, and cheese quesadillas) I can't imagine being a parent without a microwave. I know I'm pathetic, since I didn't even have to work while she was gone, but I now have a great respect for what she and many parents around the world do everyday.

With me cooking (OK maybe I'm using the verb 'cooking' loosely, but this is my blog, so wipe that smirk off your face) three meals a day and providing for our kids, Monica was hamming it up with her scrapbook friends. She even spent some time with Paris Hilton.....yes, that Paris Hilton. I'm not sure where to start with this strange situation, I just have too many questions.

1) What was Paris Hilton doing at a scrapbook convention? I just can't imagine Paris hanging out with her pals cutting out paper, photos, and decorations.
2) Why was Monica with Paris Hilton? Come on, where was Angelina Jolee or Julia Roberts? Of all the celebrities, it had to be one of the famous people in the world that is only famous for being born. She's not talented, she's not gifted, she hasn't done anything newsworthy...all she did was be born....into a rich family.

3) Why couldn't it have been me, that would have been so cool to meet Paris, she's HOT!

Mon says the trip was successful. The kids and I survived the week, though we may be a little malnourished. And we now have giant photos of Paris Hilton in our living room. What a great country!

Vegas Baby, Vegas

Mon and I had a great time in Las Vegas last week. Despite a 10-hour plane delay and slight detour through Oakland, CA, we did everything we wanted and more for a short kids-free vacation.

We got to see a couple shows, we soaked in the hot tub, we stuffed ourselves and Monica even won some money.

For me, the best thing of the entire trip was that we took NO pictures! (All men reading this just stood up and applauded) It was a great feeling to only smile when I was happy or laughing and not at the end of 1...2....3....

I would tell more about our trip, but you know the whole 'What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas' deal. I wouldn't want to wake up tomorrow next to a horse's head because I broke code. A huge thanks goes to Mon's parents, Travis, and Sarah (bro and sis in-law) for watching our kids. We were able to recharge our batteries for another month..at least.

Mamma's Takin' Over.

My wife, Monica, and I have a fanstastic relationship for many reasons, one of which is we have created roles that work well for us. For example, she makes the banana bread while I make the storage shops. A bunch of other examples have come to me now that I think about it: I make money, she spends it. I clean the vacuum, she dirties the vacuum. She diciplines the kids, I beat them. I haul the wood inside, she makes the fire each morning. I could go on, but it'll just mean more time on the couch.

One other role is when things break, I get to fix them. As I may have explained before, I'm no handy man, but with a few tools and Google, I'm learning to figure things out before calling in a repair man and forking over some $dough$. It's not a role that I'm really fond of and Monica knows it. So to my surprise when the washing machine went belly up, Monica took over. She pulled off panels, unplugged hoses, searched the Internet, she even figured out some diagnostic test. She was able to point to the problem, though did need some help in removing the last part, the clogged filter.
It made me proud to see my woman being so proactive and attacking a problem.

The problem was after washing a floor rug, the rug was obliterated and the fibers had clogged up the filter making the washer unable to drain water.

Way to go Mon!!

For the Love of Sleep

I've worked the night shift for almost 8 years now. I understand the need for sleep, though I do think sleep is a little over-rated. I can function fine on less shut-eye than most, but I do need some.

This week has been a test of my theory that only a little sleep is needed. Caleb has been acting very weird at night, only sleeping 1-2 hours and then not being able to get back to sleep. It's been one of the hardest weeks of my adult life. Nothing seems to make sense. He broke his arm 2 weeks ago and had a couple hard nights, that made sense though. But now he's not having any pain, he can turn himself in bed fine, but the boy just won't sleep.

This is what she's suppose to look like

I've tried everything from threatening him, yelling at him, sleeping with him, and comforting him, but nothing can keep him asleep for more than 2 hours at a time. Of course all the commotion at night wakes up Abby too, which causes a surreal moment of the entire family wondering around the house at 2 AM. My last idea was to tell him that if he couldn't sleep, he could close his door and play quietly in his room. So at 3 AM, Caleb would wake up, turn on his light and starting playing with his Lego's. I even checked on him a couple times while he was playing and he just smiled and asked if I wanted to play with him. The kicker to all this is that he hasn't been tired during the day either. Monica and I have been walking around like zombies and Caleb hasn't even taken a nap to recoup from his sleepless night.

A moment of Peace as Caleb sleeps

I'm fairly sure this is a phase, I hope this is phase....please, for the love of all that is good on earth, let this be a phase...

All Powerful Moo-Moo

Before Caleb was born, we bought a small stuffed animal/stuffed blanket thing from Fred Meyer, mostly because it matched the colors Monica had decorated his room. We had no idea this thing would end up with more power than the president of the United States.
Caleb slept with the animal as an infant and immediately started to only sleep in his crib when the fuzzy animal was with him. For some strange reason, Monica and I thought it was a cow. Looking back we feel like idiots for thinking this since he is yellow (like a giraffe) ,has small pointy ears (like a giraffe), and he probably came with a tag that said he was a giraffe (like a giraffe). Thinking he was a cow though, we started to call him a sound that our little son could say at a young age, "moo-moo". It was cute a first, but now Moo-Moo has turned into an obsession with young Caleb. At 6 years old, I can't think of one day that Caleb hasn't slept with Moo-Moo. He's taken Moo-Moo on road trips, to strangers' homes for comfort, to grandmas' houses, etc. Everywhere Caleb sleeps, Moo-Moo goes.
As Caleb got older, we, as parents, have had less ammunition to threaten Caleb during times of discipline. Put him in time out, he doesn't care. Spank his little butt, no big deal. Ground him from the TV or computer, he goes outside. And I knew we were messing with holy ground one day last week, when I threatened a sassy Caleb that I'd take away Moo-Moo for the night. He kept on misbehaving though and you can guess where this story is going. I reluctantly told Caleb that Moo-Moo wasn't going sleep with him that night. I'm pretty sure Caleb's eruption rivaled Mt. St. Helen's. The first thing Caleb did was beg for forgiveness, literally. Then he ran to his room and hid Moo-Moo so we couldn't get him. And when bed-time came, all hell broke loose. The screaming, crying, and sobbing lasted for hours. Caleb wouldn't stay in his bed, he kept coming down to the living room begging to see Moo-Moo again.
I played along for awhile. I even took Caleb and we tucked Moo-Moo into my bed. Then Caleb came downstairs again and he wanted just to look at pictures on the computer of Moo-Moo. He came down again asking what time he could wake up to get Moo-Moo back. He even came down asking me if it was morning yet! I finally told him to sleep on the couch by me so we both could have some peace. He feel asleep within a few minutes which allowed me to finally finish my episode of 'Man Vs. Wild'.
When Mon and I went to bed, we found out that Caleb had snuck in our room and made sure Moo Moo was comfortable. He had placed Moo-Moo on the chair, with Caleb's blanket keeping him warm, and a book propped up for Moo-Moo to read. How cute is that! The kid really cares about his buddy Moo-Moo, that's for sure.

Why would you take pictures of naked men?

I'm lucky to have great parents and yhen to have married into some great parents-in-law too. My Pa-in-law, Stuart, and I have spent a lot of time together the last couple years. We've had a lot of fun, got a lot done, and he's taught me a ton (I'm a poet and didn't know it??). Other than learning to fix things, save money, and sail, one of the greatest attributes that the Stu-man has is that he doesn't care what you think. And I love that about him (That's why I'm pretty sure he doesn't mind me telling this story) Though, he may have taken his care-free attitude a little too far a few days ago.
We were at a water-slide park for a family-day and following the water time I took Caleb to change out of our wet clothes. To avoid my hair from looking like a dog had just been attacked by a fire hose, I had brought some shampoo to wash my goldie-locks. But in the wide-open men's locker room, there wasn't a shower? I'm still a little confused of the lack of showers, but I digress. So I started washing my hair in the next best thing, the sink (You didn't think I was going to say the urinal, did you?) As I was finishing up rinsing my hair hunched over in the sink, I noted a camera flash. I turned around to see Stuart taking pictures of me. He was just about to laugh about it, when a big ole' burly, Harley-riding, beast-of-a-man growled, "Who's taking pictures in the locker room!" I'm pretty sure Stu would have crawled on his hands and knees along the gross floor if he could have. The big ole dude turned around from the urinal and looked right at Stu and repeated his roar, "Are you taking pictures in the men's locker room?" Stuart sheepishly tried to explain that he was just taking pictures of a guy washing his hair in the sink, but it was too late. I had locked up the moment in my head under the hilarious file. Good times. I love you Stu. At least I didn't tell the story about you jumping and screaming at little garder snake to only have a girl come over and pick it up with her hands and place it in a bucket for you. I always wondered where Monica got her snake-fighting skills....click here)